Beam me up, Scotty!

At last, the dream of teleportation is becoming a reality. All we need is someone on another planet or starship to save us from this human catastrophe these idiots are creating. In a recent experiment that seems straight out of a Star Trek episode, an international team of researchers has achieved a remarkable feat in the field of quantum teleportation.

In this new study, published in the journal Science Advances, scientists from the University of Turku in Finland and the University of Science and Technology of China have developed a new method of quantum teleportation that overcomes this noise and achieves a high success rate. They managed to perform near-perfect quantum teleportation despite the presence of noise that normally interrupts the transmission of quantum states. The key to success is the use of multipart hybrid entanglement, which amounts to a controlled entanglement of the qubits with their local environment.

Before we get to beaming out living beings, imagine you have written a secret message on a piece of paper. You can then use teleportation to send this message to someone far away without anyone else seeing it. That will send the CIA, NSA, and Google up the wall—OMG, what is it about? With quantum teleportation, instead of physically sending the paper, you would create an exact copy of the message in another location while destroying the original message.

Of course, if the Biden Administration gets its hands on it, they will use it to create hybrid transgender people incapable of reproducing to save the planet from human beings and CO2. Schwab’s perfect world – the quiet Earth.